Memory Lane

I’ve always been one to associate my outfits with memories. If something significant happens in my life I can definitely recite what I was wearing, right down to the jewelry. Because this is a fashion blog and I am a newly engaged woman, and because I have a fatty crush on Zachary, I thought it would be fun to  post about the outfits I’ve worn in each noteworthy moment of mine and Zach’s courtship. (I’m always excited when I get to use the word “courtship”.) And plus, you never know, I’m an avid journal keeper but what if there’s a fire and I lose all my records!? The thought makes me ill. This post right here might be the only chronicle left of my romance!

I mentioned a few weeks back that my little white and navy striped dress was what I wore when I first met Zach, but just in case you didn’t catch that post, here’s a picture. It makes me smile because neither of us had any idea that we would end up dating. We simply had a friendly conversation (both of us are open books, we’ll tell people almost anything) and then walked away not thinking a thing about it. After our initial meeting though, we used to see each other jogging in the mornings every other day and after a while it became something I kinda looked forward to. That was definitely what made Zach stick out to me and stay in my mind. My little brain needed the repetition of his face. After a month or two I used to say to myself as I’d come jogging down 1600 N. “Gee, I hope I see that cute boy today!” I should post a picture of me in my jogging get up just to make this post legitimate, but…no. You can all consider yourselves spared.

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Zach added me as a friend on facebook soon after we met but then moved to Provo and I didn’t hear from him again until four months later. He nonchalantly asked over facebook if we could meet up for lunch and I told him I work in Salt Lake and wouldn’t be able to get together in the Orem/Provo area. He said that he could do dinner in SLC on Friday night because he had a mission reunion that night and would be in my vicinity. Neither of us really knew if what we were doing was a date or not. I didn’t think so and I don’t think he initially meant it to be, but then by the end I think he wished it had been. Sadly, I was not completely impressed with Zacheral and thought it would be just fine if we didn’t get together again. I thought he seemed overly fond of himself, pompous in his opinions, and definitely concerned about making sure I knew we were only having a friendly get together. I thought “Oh brother. This guy is worried I’m going to fall madly in love with him. Good grief, there’s no danger of that!” I do love the irony. It just goes to show first impressions are almost always wrong! Anyway, this is what I wore that night we hung out in SLC last September 27th.

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Two weeks later I got a text from one of my best friends, Jo, asking if I had “friend zoned” Zach. Jo’s husband and Zach are close friends (Complete coincidence. Neither of us knew that beforehand) and apparently they were on the phone with each other when Jo heard Zach say that he didn’t think I was feelin it. Zach told Ryan I had friend zoned him and Jo immediately texted me to get the scoop. I think I said something like “Well, ya. He did too! I got the impression he only wanted to be friends.” She told him that of course, and later that evening I got a whole slew of text messages from Zach.  He asked when we could get together again and I told him that my sister, Allysann, was getting married on October 16th and that I had sold my soul to her until then. I wouldn’t be available to do a single thing until after her wedding. I heard from him a lot over those weeks via text and in one of those texting conversations I joked about him watching my favorite movie with me, Gone With the Wind. I didn’t think for a second he would dream of watching that scrumptious 1939 drama but the day after Ally’s wedding I got a text from Zach asking when we were going to get together to watch Gone With the Wind. I thought “Seriously? He really wants to watch it with me? Wow. Never met a man before in my life that was so amiable.” Zach really does watch anything with me so I try not to take advantage of his kindness. I never pick a movie that is too chickie, ya know? Unless it’s a classic like Pride and Prejudice.

 We ended up watching the first half of Gone With the Wind the Friday night after Allysann’s wedding and the second half the next weekend. After those three times of getting together to “hang out” Zach called to ask me out on our first date. I’m pretty sure it was the first week of November. This is the patriotic outfit I wore to go get Thai food 😉 After a fun and interesting talk over dinner, as he was taking me home, we got in a friendly argument and I exasperatedly threw my arms in the air to disagree with him. He calmly looked over at me and said my name (along with something else) and somehow in that one moment I knew I was probably going to have several discussions like this with him for the rest of our lives. It was strange. I certainly had never had that feeling with any other boy. I just knew. It wasn’t a significant moment for him and I definitely didn’t act like I felt anything. But as he hugged me goodnight on my doorstep, he felt it too. That’s why this outfit is one I’ll love forever.

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 Zach and I are very slow movers and it took until the first week of December (the 6th to be exact) that we had our first kiss. We had gone to a cute taco place in Provo for dinner and then back to his house to watch Pinocchio. It’s one of his very favorite Disney movies, the animation and style is incredible. Zach is an artist and he appreciates those things. We were cuddling on the couch together and after the movie ended I turned around to face him. We had been dating for about a month and half and somehow I knew that it was gonna happen that night. Sigh, those first kiss freakouts.  You know, the ones where your stomach tightens into a knot and the butterflies are almost unbearable but it’s still all so good? He lowered his face to mine and left it there, his nose on mine, for what felt like a really long time. Just enough time for me to build up a little anxiety 😉 He finally went for it and the DVD track, When You Wish Upon a Star, played incessantly in the background. That song will always remind me of  Zachercracker’s and my first kiss. It was precious. So is this little striped dress which is what I was wearing when it all went down.

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I wore this saucy red number on Valentines Day when Zach said “I love you” for the first time. He had come up to Salt Lake to meet me for dinner, we ate at a place called My Thai (I guess we’re totally into Thai food?) and when we got in the car to drive back to his place he reached out and hugged me. He held me for a second, then said some sweet things followed by those three ominous words. I say ominous only because I was terrified of them. I felt like if we started saying that to each other then a marriage proposal was right around the corner. I didn’t think either of us was ready for that! It didn’t seem to me that you could just be in love for another year or two, I feared things were about to move fast. I knew I loved him of course, but did I marriage love him!? AH! He was adorable that night, though, and sweet and thoughtful, and although I wasn’t quite ready to say it back to him I did tell him about my experience in the car with him after our first date. That counts for something, right? Zach is just as afraid of commitment as I am so I knew it was doubly hard for him to put himself out there like that. I definitely appreciated his vulnerability.

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I took the weekend (Saturday and Sunday) to drive my sister Danielle to her new home in Arizona.  While I was on that arduous journey I had plenty of time to think about Zach. Yes, I knew I was in love. Yes, I knew that Zach was going to be the one I married. But did I want to admit it? It was way too scary! Zach and I both love being single a lot. I think it’s what we’re both most comfortable with and let’s face it, being single has a lot of perks. But after those couple days of deep thinking I came to the conclusion that I loved Zach and I needed to face it head on. Time to be a grown up. The next morning after my trip to Arizona was Zach’s birthday and I had lots of plans for us. The moment I walked into his house and hugged him I felt a rush of relief. I had missed him so much. I just had to tell him! So I did. As we flopped on his couch together I said “Zach, I love you. I really do!” I was wearing this orange plaid number because he had requested I dress casually. This was the best I could do.  His birthday, February 17th, was one of my very favorite days I’ve ever spent with him.

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 The last noteworthy outfit I wore with Zach was this happy little one from a couple weeks ago. This is what I wore the night he proposed. He picked me up after work and took me to a little antique shop on Center Street in Provo. The store was closed but the owners opened it exclusively for us. I thought that was pretty neat. He let me pick out my own ring and then once it was in a pretty little round, gold box, he took me to dinner at the restaurant we went to on our first date. I thought he was going to propose there, but no. He paid the check and then we went out to the car. I thought “Huh. I guess he’s saving it for another day?” but once I got situated in the car I could tell he was getting a little uncomfortable and fidgety and I thought “Oh my, are things about to get real right now!? Eeeeeeeeee!” What he said was very sincere and to the point. That’s my Zag for ya. He asked me to marry him and I felt like being a little bit impish. I said “Well, this might come as a surprise to you… but yes.” I think for only a fragment of a second he thought I was going to say no or that I need more time. I’m so mean. He didn’t get on one knee like is traditionally expected because I’m a bit of a feminist and I’m afraid that conventionality has always rubbed me the wrong way. Why does he need to get on his knees and beg? Aren’t we supposed to be equal? I never want to be placed on some Victorian pedestal, I want to be level with him. I know, you’re all thinking I’m tragically unromantic, but here’s the thing: I was sitting in that exact car in that exact seat after eating at that exact restaurant when I realized that Zachary was going to be my boy forever. I felt like we had come in full circle. It was all very poetic and personal and really, that’s all I ever require.

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And here’s the only real picture we have together. The rest are sad selfies. We have to work on that.unnamed

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12 thoughts on “Memory Lane

  1. ONE OF MY MOST FAVORITE POSTS EVER!!!! I loved hearing your story. 🙂 I’m so happy you both found each other & fell in love. I love you, Cootie Cakes!!!!

    • Oh my, December 6th!? Well that makes the whole experience double in value! Glad we got to seal your birthday with a kiss. You’re the best. And I can’t wait to see pictures of your wee one.

  2. Oh my goodness… What a great read. The honesty, the love, the outfits (of course), and my favorite part, the Zach renditions… I think Zachercracker is my most favorite.

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